How to talk to Children and adults about your vision loss.
Most of this is from my childhood, or what it has been like raising my children around the visually impaired. I am hoping to have a few guests to share their experiences. This will be a two-month topic. We will start with newborn- toddler years and go up through highschoolers.
Let’s start off with how to tell a baby you have sight loss. Babies are very good at noticing differences in people from an early age. You will be surprised at a child who is learning to crawl moving for someone who might not be able to see them on the floor. Small children also notice that eye contact is not being made. They might turn your face to try to look at your eyes. Or they may wave their hands to make sure you aren’t pretending not to see them. All of this can be normal as they figure out the big world around them.
Talking to toddlers, 2-4 years old is when things start to make more sense to them. They might have already noticed that you use your hands to feel things instead of looking for an item. This age group usually starts to ask questions. Many times, it is best to give a precise answer without too much information.
Here’s an example from my own children: Why does Gram use her fingers to read? Because Gram can’t see she uses Braille to read the words. She reads them with her fingers so she can know what the book says.
One way to make the toddler stage easier can be to show them the various ways that you (person you know) has made adjustments. I like to show off Braille games that can be played with my child and the visually impaired person. We also talk about Braille books. Sometimes we show off the way the microwave is marked so Gram can use it. Again, take each situation and question as it comes.
Example Question: Why does Gram have to feel the table when she’s cooking? Well, Gram cannot see the table right? So she uses her hands to feel where the bowl is and where the next item she needs is. This is how she makes sure all the ingredients get into the bowl instead of around it!
When talking to preschool age children, you can have some of the most fun and entertaining conversations. This age group is able to start recognizing the differences that are around them. You may find them to be helpful with things around the house or outside. But you may also find that they are starting to become a bit timid or fearful being around someone different.
Use this age as a time to start showing that just because someone is different or does not have sight, they can do the same things as everyone else. This is a great time to share how you navigate regular life. Share how your vision loss does not keep you from doing life. Somedays it is fun to show them how you navigate new surroundings with a cane, guide dog, or with the vision you do have. You can also share ways that you do everyday life: using a microwave, using a stove, cooking, cleaning, reading, doing emails or technology.
What about elementary age kids? This is where some schools may request for someone to come and give a talk about the blind community. This can include, Braille, orientation and mobility tricks, technology. This is the age to introduce children to ways they can introduce themselves to a blind person. They can learn how to sighted guide/ human guide a person with vision loss. They can also learn the proper terms to use with a person who has vision loss. This is also the perfect time to start the conversation that just because I can’t see doesn’t mean I am worth less or not just as valuable as someone who may have their full vision. Take time to let them ask questions. Many want to know that your vision loss is not a communicable disease. Some may ask if you had a relative who had vision loss. Today is the day to share with these kids so they can share with their families and communities the amazing life that you have been given.
For the middle school through adult ages, I believe that the other principles apply. But the biggest difference is reminding people that we are each unique in our differences. And that those differences should not scare others. Mention ways to help a blind student/adult when they see them. Don’t grab them. Don’t push them. Teach them to use directional terms (left, right, straight); landmarks ( water fountain, staircase going up, intersection, couch, chairs, counter). These kids are our future and are the ones that if we can teach them basic principles of sighted guiding we can also teach them how to teach others. These are the fun ages with many questions. But I think they are also our leaders and people who might be able to help us with the changes we need to see.
I really hope you all enjoyed this topic. We will take July off from regular posting as it is always busy with national conferences and travel. We actually are starting homeschooling back up July 10th to allow for more breaks in the cooler months!
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